From early childhood, we’re taught to persevere, never give up, and push through when the going gets tough. We’re conditioned to believe that success lies in the struggle and that winners never quit. But what if the smartest move a leader can make isn’t to keep going, but rather walk away? In a world obsessed with achieving, knowing when to quit is perhaps one of the most underdeveloped and undervalued leadership skills. This is especially true for learning and talent professionals who are increasingly expected to help solve their company’s biggest challenges while enduring static or decreasing budgets and staffing.
Most of us never learn this valuable skill, nor do we see it modeled by others. But that’s where neuroscience can help. Because the real reason quitting is hard isn’t weakness. It’s the way we’re wired.
We’re Biologically Wired to Keep Going—Even When We Shouldn’t
The human brain is engineered for goal pursuit. Three neurotransmitters: dopamine, opioids, and oxytocin, play crucial roles in how we chase, achieve, and emotionally connect with goals.
- Dopamine fuels motivation and drive. It’s the “I want it” chemical, released as we anticipate rewards – not even when we receive them, but when we think we’re close. This makes it hard to let go of goals, even irrational ones.
- Opioids provide the feeling of satisfaction – the emotional “high” when we accomplish something. That feeling is addictive. So even when a project falters, our brain still clings to the possibility of that hit.
- Oxytocin, the bonding chemical, deepens our commitment to team-based goals. When we strive alongside others, we grow emotionally attached to the process, not just the outcome. Abandoning the mission can feel like betraying our people.
Challenges for Learning & Talent Leaders
These neurochemical forces mean we aren’t just pushing projects forward—we’re emotionally and biologically invested in them, which makes quitting feel like a threat to our identity, our relationships, and our sense of purpose. Consider these three common challenges:
1—Sunsetting programs
It can be difficult to sunset a program that you fought hard to propose, champion, build, and roll out. Each of those phases requires high investment, both emotionally and energetically. So, it’s natural to be reluctant to sunset a program that has moved past the apex of its efficacy. You might even be blind to the obvious signs of decreased enrollment and flagging evaluations. However, your business is best served when all of its talent resources are used to benefit the most people and support the most critical strategic goals.
2—Letting go of people
For professionals whose core belief is that everyone is capable of learning and growing, it’s painful to face the reality that some people may no longer be the right fit. Sometimes, we make the wrong hire and need to do a better job of interviewing for the qualities that will sustain success. Sometimes, a person is unable or unwilling to upskill themselves at the pace the company needs. And sometimes, people are no longer aligned with the vision or values of the business or its leaders. Whatever the reason, it’s critical to be able to make this call sooner rather than later.
3—Leaving an organization
Because we are the “keepers of the culture,” we can become especially attached to an organization, sometimes to our professional (and even personal) detriment. Perhaps you onboarded under a phenomenal manager who has since left. Or perhaps new leadership is taking a path that no longer aligns with your sense of purpose. Or maybe your needs for balance and creativity are no longer served by this role. Identifying when you have shifted from thriving to struggling, or even to suffering, is critical for empowering leadership, your health and well-being.
Strategies for Success
So how do we lead smarter? By building habits and systems that counterbalance these biases. Below are seven strategies, backed by neuroscience and behavioral science, that can help leaders know when it’s time to walk away.
1. Set Your Quitting Criteria Before You Start
In 1996, two elite mountaineers, Rob Hall and Scott Fischer, led expeditions up Everest. They warned their clients of a strict turnaround time: 1:00 p.m. Summit after that, and you risk not making it back down alive. They knew that fatigue and altitude impact decision-making.
But on summit day, they broke their own rule. They kept going. Hours later, eight people, including both leaders, were dead.
Why? Because once we’re in motion, our judgment narrows. Dopamine is still firing. Turning back feels like a loss. But had they honored their pre-established “go/no-go” rules, they likely would have lived.
Takeaway: BEFORE you start, establish “if/then” rules for projects. Example: “If we haven’t hit X milestone by Y date, we pause and reassess.” Remove emotional decision-making from the equation.
2. Account for the Sunk-Cost Effect (It’s a Cognitive Trap)
The brain doesn’t like waste. That’s why we irrationally consider time, energy, and money already spent when deciding what to do next, even though those resources are gone.
This is the sunk-cost fallacy. And the prefrontal cortex, responsible for logic and rational planning, can easily get overruled by the limbic system when our identity is on the line.
A great example of this is California’s infamous high-speed rail project to connect San Diego to San Francisco. Since 2008, over $9 billion has been invested, but nearly 20 years later, there’s still no finished line, and the latest estimate predicts a completion date of 2050, with a projected total cost of $300 billion. Why does it continue? Because admitting failure feels more painful than continuing on, hopefully, to achieve the dreamed-of success.
In addition, this specific project has fallen victim to several of these psychological biases and is a great case study in how they can layer on to further bind up a change initiative.
Takeaway: Regularly reframe decisions as forward-looking: “Would we start this project today, knowing what we know now?”
3. Beware of Loss Aversion—It’s Twice as Powerful as Gain
Thanks to a brain structure called the habenula, we are neurologically programmed to avoid future loss based on past negative experiences. The emotional sting of loss is roughly twice as impactful as the pleasure of a win.
This causes leaders to “chase losses,” hoping to dig their way out. It’s the same behavior you see at a gambling table where people keep chasing the next potential win. And it shows up in business decisions that favor pride over pragmatism because leaders dream of the potential gain, albeit productivity or profit.
Takeaway: Normalize intelligent quitting in your culture. Debrief what not to repeat and celebrate the time, energy, and resources that were actually saved.
4. Tackle the Monkeys First (Don’t Waste Time on the Pedestals)
Astro Teller of Alphabet’s X team uses a brilliant metaphor: If your goal is to get a monkey to juggle bowling pins while standing on a pedestal, train the monkey first, as opposed to building the pedestal.
In change management, we often see teams avoid the hardest part of a project because the brain prefers dopamine “wins” from checking easy boxes. But if you don’t tackle the real challenge first, you’re just dressing up failure because it’s likely to cause your downfall in the end.
Takeaway: Identify the hardest variable—the part most likely to kill the project. Test that first. If it’s not viable, stop.
5. Offset the Optimism Bias
Humans are chronically overconfident. In one study, 80% of entrepreneurs believed their ventures had a higher chance of success than similar businesses—even when data suggested otherwise.
This isn’t arrogance. It’s optimism bias—a dopamine-fueled belief that this time will be different. In the brain, optimism feels good. But it can lead to repeated blind spots.
Takeaway: Ask your team: “What’s our confidence level? And what would we need to see to decrease that confidence?” Build discipline around negative scenario planning.
6. Recognize the Status Quo Bias
When faced with change, the amygdala (our brain’s threat detector) flares up. The known—even when it’s failing—often feels safer than the unknown. This is why we stick with outdated tools, broken systems, or fading strategies.
As Annie Duke puts it: “Quitting requires being okay with not knowing what might have been.” That uncertainty is something our brains hate, which primes us to stick with the status quo, often to our detriment
But consider the example of Stewart Butterfield, founder of Flickr, who shut down his failing online game “Glitch” at its peak because he saw the long-term numbers didn’t add up. He closed the doors and returned the $6 million he still had in the bank to their investors. But he was able to salvage an element of the game and sold it as Slack for nearly $28 million.
Takeaway: When staying the course, ask: Are we avoiding a tough call, or strategically gathering more data?
7. Don’t Get Too Attached to What You’ve Built
The endowment effect explains why people overvalue what they own or create. Their investment in the project goes beyond fondness to attachment. In the brain, ownership activates areas tied to identity and emotion.
That’s why letting go of a product, initiative, or presentation you built yourself feels so hard. But novelists and filmmakers notoriously must engage in a process called “kill your darlings”—a ruthless approach for cutting out scenes and characters you love for the good of the overall story arc or screentime.
Takeaway: Bring in outside perspectives to challenge your assumptions. Use postmortems not just to learn, but to unlearn.
The Courage to Walk Away
Our brains are not optimized for quitting, but as a learning or talent leader, yours needs to be.
Success isn’t linear, and it’s unrealistic to think you can see every initiative through to the finish line. Reframe your perspective: instead of seeing quitting as weak, see it as a sign of wisdom, humility, and strategic foresight.
By understanding the brain science behind your perceptions and putting systems in place to counteract bias, you’ll not only make better decisions but also create a culture that values smart, sustainable progress over blind perseverance.
In the long term, while great leaders know when to press on, the smartest ones know when to let go.
Dr. Britt Andreatta is an internationally recognized thought leader who draws on her background in leadership, neuroscience, psychology, and education to create science-based solutions for today’s workplace challenges. Britt is the CEO of Brain Aware Training and the former CLO for Lynda.com (LinkedIn Learning).
She has over 10 million views worldwide of her online courses and is the author of several best-selling books on the brain science of success, including Wired to Grow, Wired to Resist, Wired to Connect, and Wired to Become. In 2024, she was awarded the ATD Thought Leader Award. She has also been named as a Top 10 Influencer in Learning and a Top 20 Influencer for Leadership Development. Dr. Andreatta regularly consults with organizations on leadership development and learning strategy.
